NintendoLand Deathmatch summary
Mario VS. Link

The camera shows Peach, Luigi, Toad and Mallow sitting in the crowd. Peach is wearing her traditional Pink dress, Luigi his green clothes, Toad a "Mario's the man!" -shirt and Mallow a big fluffy sweater with Mario's face on it.
 
Jim: Mario's got his faithful fans here tonight!
 
Benny: Yes, Jim, and Link has got his fans in the other end of the dome.
 
The camera cuts to a view of Princess Zelda sitting in a special booth with 20 Hurylian guards. The guard's armor shine in the spotlight.
 
Benny: Our dear Zelda is showing off!
 
Jim: Yada, yada... The important thing is that I'm Jimmy "the Man", *smiles* ,and that - THIS WILL BE ONE HELL OF A FIGHT!
 
Benny: Yes, indeed. Each of our fighters will have a whole bunch of weapons. Link will have his wide arsenal of weapons and Mario will have as many power ups as he can carry in his pockets. So kids, this could be a very bloody fight, so fetch an adult to hold hands with, if it gets out of hand...
 
Jim: Ourrr firrrsssstttt contestant; you all know him, Mario!
 
Mario appears in one corner of the ring and does the "V" sign.
 
Mario: It's-a mee, Mario!
 
Benny: And in the other corner of the ring, the Legendary Hero, the Hero of Time; Link!
 
The crowd glances at the far corner of the ring but nobody is there. A sounds is heard. It's the distant sound of hoofs tapping against a metal floor. Without any warning, Link bursts out of the revolving doors and rides down the isle, on his horse Epona, towards the ring. The speed increases as they approach the ring.

Mario: He's-a crazy!

With only a couple of meters left until the ring, Epona takes a huge leap and jumps over the fence. Link jumps off his horse and shows of by drawing his Master Sword and standing in an aggressive pose.

Jim: OK, let's get this show on the road... Begin!
 
Mario takes to the air and tries to jump on Link, who throws himself out of harms way. Mario runs after Link and performs another jump, this time he hits Link.
 
Mario: I'm mean and red I'm...... uhm.... Mario!
 
Behind him, Link prepares to attack with his sword. The Master Sword glances in the light as Link swings it after Mario, but Mario dodges the attack and kicks Link in the stomach.

Benny: It seams Link is having a tough time! Maybe he didn't expect such a fast and versatile enemy...

Link: You shouldn't have do that, you stupid..... plumber!

Mario: Oh, I just did and watch me do it again!

Mario takes a fire flower out of his pocket and turns into Fire Mario.

Mario: I'm gonna burn ya!

Link holds his trusty Mirror Shield ready as Mario throws his first pack of fireballs. They bounce a couple of times and hits the shield. Upon impact they are magically absorbed into Link's shield. Mario keeps on throwing and gets more and more desperate for each fireball. Link's shield soon starts to glow and when the 10:th fire ball hits the shield, it is fully loaded. A big worm of fire is emitted from the shield, heading right at Mario. Mario gets burned in the inferno.

Mallow (from the audience): Mario!

Mario: Auuuuchhh!

Link looks in his magical poach after the next weapon to use. He picks up the bow and arrow and aims for Mario. A arrow hurls through the air and hits the burning ground just to the right of Mario.

Mario: Yikes!

Another arrow hits the fence behind Mario, another is heading right towards him. Mario jumps to the side only to have to dodge another arrow. Mario takes up a power up from his pocket and turns into, Metal Mario! The next second an arrow bounces off his shoulder. Link's face shows a clear expression of surprise and fear.

Mario: It's-a me Terminator Mario!

Link shoots another arrow that bounces of Mario's head.

Mario: It's judgment day hero...

The heavy Metal Mario walks with slow but determined steps towards the elf boy. Mario throws a powerful punch that Link just manages shield with his shield. Another punch hits Link over the head and sends his Master Sword flying. Link sees an opportunity and uses his hook shot. It gets stuck in the fence on the other side of the ring. Link pulls in the chain and flies across the ring, out of Mario's reach.

Mario: You can run but you can't hide...

Link puts back the hook shoot, and instead takes up a heavy metal hammer; the Megaton Hammer. He runs towards Mario with the hammer high up in the air. Mario stands still, preparing to give Link another of his trust punches. Link jumps to the side as Mario throws his first powerful punch, and with all his available power, buries the hammer in Mario's side.

Mario : Oh, look what you've done! A bump in my Metal suit!

Mario throws a punch and hits Link's left shoulder. A low sounds is heard, the sound of a bone breaking.
 
Link: Aoooooch!

Link's left arm is just hanging on the side of his body, not moving - It's broken. In a sudden rage Link swings the hammer again, with his right arm only. Mario tries to jump to safety but his weight unables him to do so. The Megaton Hammer hits Mario in the right leg.

Mario: Aoch!

Mario turns into normal Mario.

Mario: Now you've done it. Its Star Man time!

Mario holds up the StarMan, and its almost infinite energy is transferred into Mario's body. He runs towards Link, who is in the middle of doing some strange dance on the floor.

Mario: It's-a me Johnny!

Just as Mario only has a couple of meters between him and Link, a green glow is emitted. Shortly after that a green diamond shaped magical cage is shaped around Link. Mario keeps on running.

Mario: Nothing can beat the Star-

Mario runs straight into the wall of the magical cage. The walls are as solid as brick walls, even with the StarMan.

Mario: ...Man.....

Mario gets to his feet and stands there staring at Link. Both fighter just stand there. It's a stalemate, nobody can make any attack. Soon the StarMan wears of and so does Link's Nayrus Love spell.

Mario: Your pissing me of...

Link spares no time. He runs towards the Master Sword and picks it up.

Link: Come and get me you little brat!

Mario: Ok, you'll get a biiiig bruise now, elf boy!

Mario starts to run, and Link changes to a stance where he's hold the Master Sword backwards. As Mario approaches Link, the Master Swords starts to glow. Link let's go of the incredible amount of power stored in the Master Sword. He spins around and a huge wall of fire is created on all side. Mario's face shows signs of pain and he throws himself backward.

Mario: Aoch you hit my leg!

Mario's blue trousers have a big cut in the left leg. Blood can be seen on the cloth.

Link: I'm gonna end this game now...
 
Link runs towards Mario who is lying writhing in pain.
 
Jim: Blood blood blood!!! Cut his throat Link!
 
Link approaches Mario, and the fear raises in the plumbers eyes. Link raises his Master Sword and hits Mario in the head - with the haft. Mario faints...
 
Mallow: You bastard Link! I'm think I'm gonna cry...
 
The sound of rain beating the metal roof of the NintendoLand Deathmatch dome, is heard.
 
Link: Calm down you piece of fluff, he's only unconscious... We need someone to fight evil in this world too...
 
Link pauses and look up at the commentator booth.
 
Link: And you...you... Jim, you wanted me to cut his trout...? I ought to do something about you.
 
------
 
The rest of the program didn't make it to the final cut, due to the extreme amount of violence. But I can say this. Link took his NintendoLand Deathmatch medallion and wore it with pride. That was after he had tried to make Jim to eat it, though. When that didn't work, Link sets Jim's trousers on fire with a mini version of Din's Fire.
 
After that everyone was pleased, except for Jim (and Mario)...