NintendoLand Deathmatch summary
Samus Aran VS. Joanna Dark

Mario: Good morning,ladies and gentlemen!
 
Luigi: Today we have two female competitors,whose names are Samus Aran and Joanna Dark!

Mario: This match is a complete waste of time. Everyone knows Joanna will win.
Luigi: That is your opinion.
 
Mario: Well,she will win! She has a much greater choice of weapons than Samus,and more experience.
 
Luigi: That is not true. Although I am not siding with her,Samus has been on three complicated missions, therefore giving her more experience,and has a wider array of weapons.
 
Mario: If you're so sure,bet me 200 mushrooms!
 
Luigi: Your'e on!

As the Mario brothers wait,a large UFO arrives in the Nintendoland Deathmatch Arena. A small alien waves bye as a young woman steps out of the UFO,and into the arena.
 
Mario: Announcing Joanna Dark!

Several minutes later,an awesome spaceship gracefully lands in the Arena.

Luigi: Destroyer of Mother Brain,eradicator of the Queen Metroid,please give a cheer for Samus Aran!
 
A heavily armored suit does an incredible backflip into the Arena. Joanna looks at Samus with an "unfair" look,due to her protective suit.
 
Mario: Deathmatch Start!

Joanna charged at Samus.Samus simply stuck her foot out,nailing Joanna.
Joanna flew into the walls of the Deathmatch Stadium,cracking it a lot. She recuperated,and pulled out her Falcon 2. She stood on her feet,shooting at Samus.However,the weak firepower had no effect on Samus. Before she had a chance to try to do anything,Samus instantly ran up to her and let loose with a barrage of punches and kicks in a manner similar to that of Majora's Incarnation. The startled Joanna pulls out a Devastator,firing it madly at Samus. The grenade deals .1 damage to Samus. Joanna pulls out a Combat Knife. She goes after Samus, and gets the knife kicked out of her hand,and kicked in the face.

Luigi: Go Samus!

Mario: Shut up!

Joanna then pulled out a powerful weapon-the CrossBow. She shoots an arrow at Samus. She catches it and throws it back at triple speed. Joanna quickly dodges it,and gets side kicked in the face by Samus. While on the ground,Joanna gets the crap beat out of her by Samus. Joanna fires a laser straight at Samus's chest. It pushes her back. Seeing how this was useful,Joanna fired a long laser at Samus,keeping her at bay. Joanna then threw a Proximity Mine at Samus's feet.Samus flipped backwards and shot the mine,destroying it. Joanna,not knowing Samus had guns,stepped back. She put on her Invisibility Cloak. Ha! Joanna thought. Samus turned on her X-Ray Scope and spotted Joanna. Samus ran at the startled Joanna full force (withoot Speed Booster)and threw herself at Joanna.Joanna was once again driven at the same wall. However,this time it broke,and water came gushing through the broken wall.

Mario: Flood!

Luigi: What are you complaining about? We're in the Hosting Booth,which is higher than the water!

Mario: Oh. Go Joanna!

The crowd left their front-row seats,for water came in up to that height.

Luigi: This will be an exciting battle,for now both contestants will be in water!

Mario: Later,I'm going to charge Samus for that wall.
Samus and Joanna were once again duking it out,Samus moving slowly. Joanna put on an Oxygen Tank and kicked Samus in the stomach. Samus retaliated by punching Joanna in the face. The slow combat went on,until Samus decided to put on her Gravity Suit.

Luigi: Great move,Samus!

Mario: Great move,Samus! (sarcastically)

Samus was now moving extraordinarily fast underwater,as if it wasn't there. Joanna experienced the "Incarnation" move again. A half-dead Joanna floated up to the surface of the water. A Joanna-fan koopa tossed her a max mushroom,which healed her completely. (Luigi later stomped on this Koopa Troopa for breaking the rules.) A nucleus that nobody noticed in the water exited the stadium. All the water went with it. Suddenly,Link from The Ocarina of Time stood up. "Morpha!"he screamed,and started chasing the water. All the water in the stadium was gone,so Samus took off her Gravity Suit. Joanna suddenly had an idea. Samus went to bodyslam Joanna.At the last millisecond,Joanna moved,and Samus hit the ground. This dealt 5 damage to Samus. Joanna smirked.

Mario: Good thinking,Joanna! Squish that Samus to a bug!

Luigi: If that koopa would have followed the rules,Samus would have won by now.

Mario: Nobody asked for your two cents!
 
Luigi: Yours neither.
 
Mario: You are a rotten son of a goomba!
 
Luigi: Takes one to know one.
 
Mario: Grrr...

Meanwhile,Samus was beating Joanna up again. Joanna pulled out the laser again,tripping Samus with it. Joanna then stood beside the tripped Samus,shooting her laser at Samus,driving her into the ground. After she was at least 10 feet into the ground,Joanna pushed the sand on top of Samus,burying her.

Mario: I knew Joanna would win! Where are my two hundred mushrooms,Samus Freak?

Luigi: Samus could come out of there,you know.

Mario: No she couldn't.
 
Luigi: Do not underestimate Samus's abilities.

12 seconds later,a Wave Beam shot fired from the sand. Samus emerged from the ground.
 
Luigi: Told you.
 
Mario: Damn.
 
Joanna was ready,and shot Samus in the face with a sniper. She tried several other forms of weaponry,but to no avail. Samus ran at her,but she put on the Invisibility Cloak. Samus tried her X-Ray scope,but it was disabled from the laser. "Crap,"Samus thought. She let her instincts take over,not paying any attention at all to her sense of sight,instead,focusing on her sense of sound. CRASH! Samus backfisted an invisible Joanna,sending her once again into a wall. Samus flying-kicked Joanna,sending her into the same wall,nearly breaking it. Samus switched her beam to ice,and froze Joanna. While Joanna was frozen,Samus kicked her around the stadium. Some fans of Samus made jokes about Joanna and a deformed football. When Joanna unfroze,she taunted Samus. "Try me without your suit! Whats wrong? Scared? Thought so." Samus took off her suit,revealing a blond woman in a black bikini. Some Samus fans whistled. Some idiot yelled "TAKE IT OFF!!!" Samus turned around quickly and froze the idiot telling her to strip. Joanna lunged at Samus,who retaliated by kicking her in the stomach. While Joanna was down,Samus,with her foot on Joanna's neck,took out all Joanna's weapons and threw them out of the stadium. "Come on!" said Samus,making a beckoning motion with her left hand. Joanna got up quickly,and delivered a jump kick to Samus's face. Anticipating Joanna's movements,Samus grabbed Joanna's foot and broke it.Joanna screamed in pain. Samus took Joanna's other leg,and broke it. Joanna screamed in more pain. "I surrender!" said Joanna.

Mario: She.... surrenders?
 
Luigi: Yup. My mushrooms?

Mario: Here! (forks over two mushrooms).
 
Luigi: Where's the other 198?

Mario: Damn... (forks over 198 mushrooms)
 
Luigi steps out of the hosting booth,and makes her way to Samus Aran, presenting her with a deathmatch medal.
 
Luigi: Here you go,Miss Aran.

Samus: Thanks.
 
Mario: Well,thats the deathmatch for tonight.
 
Luigi: From Brooklyn,everybody,good night!
 
 
This summary was written by: Ryan Richard